Dinner choices

Wife : Do you want dinner?

Husband : Sure, what are my choices?

Wife : Yes and no.

Puzzle

In the middle of the forest, you have been tied and hanging from a tree with the rope anchored to the ground. A candle is burning the rope. The lion is waiting for you to get dropped. A good lunch for the lion but your fate is at stake.




Your survival hinges on the rope staying intact. There is no one around to help you.

What to do now...



Just Think




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Think








Sing a Happy Birthday Song

Suicide

Love

Girl : Do you love me?

Boy : Yes Dear.

Girl : Would you die for me?

Boy : No, mine is undying love.

Absent mind

An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.

'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'

'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.

'How long has what been going on?' said the man.

Dream

Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?

Peter: Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.

Waiter

Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.

Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?

Babysitting

Superstition

Thief A: Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!

Thief B : But this is the 13th floor.

Thief A: Hurry! this is no time for superstitions .

Blind man

Waiter

Waiter : I have stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.

Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

Soup

Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.

Waiter : That's all right sir, he won't drink much.

Soup

Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.

Waiter : Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.

Think twice before you help somebody

Little Susie

Little Susie came running into the house after school one day, shouting,"Daddy! Daddy! I got a 100 in school today!"
"That's great, Sweetheart," said her daddy.
"Come in to the living room and tell me about it."

"Well," began the confession, "I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math's and 20 in science."

Waiter

Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?

Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste?

Customer : No, I can't.

Waiter : Then does it really matter ?

Waiter

Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs?

Waiter : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.